AA ‘Big Book’ – Quote
Resentment is the ‘number one’ offender. It destroys more alcohlolics than anything else. From it stem all forms of spiritual disease, for we have been not only mentally and physically ill, we have been spiritually sick. – Pg. 64 – How It Works
I am less well today. I started to become ill and also to panic but I have decided not to panic. Its not worth it. Its frequently inaccurate. It makes things worse and kicks depression into action.
So I bring my expectations of the day down. Just get through it.
I ALSO don’t slip into the Resentment or Fear. I would like to but they also make the day miserable. So I settle in for the night. Don’t fret about the tasks I have. Leave them until tomorrow.
I am in a process of healing. I am taking the time to allow my body to become clean and whole and as I do that, my mind seems to heal, too. Thoughts arise, thoughts I have blocked out during normal waking hours. They scare me, sometimes. Where are they coming from. Me? But as I allow them to come forward a curious thing happens. They become less threatening. They are, after all, just thoughts. They only really have power when I fear them and push them away. If I welcome them into the sun lit rooms of my mind, they sort of spread out and relax. They are just fears. Anxieties. Parts of me I don’t want to know about. But today I understand that I cannot really keep secrets from me. Today I let these thoughts have room to breathe and as they do, a curious thing happens. They dissipate.
I awaken to my inner life
– Tian Dayton PhD