Ah How sweet was a clean and sober relationship !
I tell you. The little things I am doing take INCREDIBLE effort. I am so resistant to going out nowadays and afraid of it that to be moving house is the stuff of nightmares. I tire easily and begin to bleed. As well as that all the moves from 2002-2014 were with my beloved helpmeet. He handled them well – or maybe we handled them well together.
Now I find myself needing to PROGRAMME myself as I did in early recovery. Like an automaton. Till I find a place to rest.